Friday, April 04, 2014

A Blank Canvas

I'm not just navigating Nashville. I'm navigating a whole new culture, new parenting dynamic, new financial status, new friendships. I could go on. Everything in my life is new and while I love a blank canvas I dont necessarily want my life to be one. 

I've always had a problem with the big decision-making in my life. Most of the time the decisions were made for me after I procrastinated long enough. For example, my second year of college I lamented over what to major in and I looked at my transcript to see that most of my credits already were English credits. Done. English Lit major. When it comes to small stuff, I tend to take the reigns with no problem. I know that I want to paint a wall green or I know that I want Mexican food for dinner. But the big stuff is daunting. 

I feel constantly pulled by my two sides: the go-for-dreams-and-work-your-butt-off side and the relax-everything-is-going-to-be-okay-whatever-will-be-will-be side. It feels like a tug of war but what ends up happening is that I try really hard at something, get frustrated and impatient when it doesn't produce the way I want it to, change my focus and it's back to square one. Everything does end up working out.

When Dan and I were figuring out what life would be like in Nashville, and what I'd do after the move, we settled on wedding photography because I could work very few hours (all day, one day a week) and edit during Liam's naps. The schedule seemed like a great fit.

Well, I've only been here 6 weeks but it's SO.HARD. to start a new business in a new city while taking care of a child. So, I started to look for part-time work and stumbled upon a great opportunity which combines my creativity with my administrative side. I will still be working limited hours throughout the week and long shifts on weekends. I am so excited for this opportunity - for myself and for our family. When I told Dan about it he said, jokingly, "So we're super rich again?!"... Yes, dear. Rich in love, rich in hope.

Looking forward to painting our blank canvas with beautiful colors.


  1. Your words are lovely. :) You'll figure it out, but waiting until God reveals it to you is so tough!

    1. Thank-you, Sara! Patience is hard.

  2. I'm excited for you and have loved reading about your new adventures. Looking forward to reading more about the new gig!

    1. Thanks for following our chaos, Jes :)


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