Wednesday, January 04, 2012

The New Year

The New Year by Death Cab for Cutie on Grooveshark 

 "So this is the new year and I dont feel any different. 
The clanking of crystal. Explosions off in the distance. 
So this is the new year and I have no resolution."

Tacoma's First Night. 12/31/11.  Pyrithian Temple.

I love New Years Eve.  I have always loved it.  As a child, it was a night with no rules.  We would go to my dad's best friends house because it was his birthday.  The adults would go out and the kids, me and my siblings and my parents friends' kids who happen to be my best friends, would do whatever we wanted.  We would eat and play some of cousin Ryan's sweet video games!  My parents and their friends would return before midnight and we would ring in the new year with firecrackers and Dick Clark and the banging of pots and pans.  Then, we'd pile into the van and dad would drive us home and carry us to bed.  

As an adult, I've loved dressing up pretty and spending time with friends.  The anticipation of midnight is still so exciting!  But the allure fades around 12:01am every January 1st.  January 1st is a day like any other but, for me, it's filled with such a vast amount of anxiety.  Introspection of the past is replaced by fear of the future.  [Insert previous year] was alright but what will [current new year] be like?   I have goals and expectations for 2012 but I am so tired from 2011 ... and 2010... that my expectations are so low.     

Aleaf playing at Tacoma's First Night. 12/13/11.  Last Photo of the Day.

I get depressed every January.  Probably because I love Christmas and New Years Eve so much and I realize that once they are over I have nothing to look forward to until summer.  And, here in the great Pacific Northwest, summer is at least 7 months away.  So, it is for that reason that my dear husband has forgone his trip home between this next tour in order fly me to Arizona for two weeks.  Just the two of us, in the desert, blogging and working and taking photos and talking and trying to relax - whatever that means.  For me, relaxation is taking a break from the stress of life to reconnect - with God, with my husband, with nature, with my creative side.  

I'm working on a list of goals (rather than resolutions) and finding peace will be at the top of that list.  Seek peace this 2012, my dear friends.  Peace, joy and contentment can be yours.  


Wonderful souls.
Tacoma's First Night, 12/31/11.


  1. don't be depressed! you have such lovely things coming to you this year. :)

  2. Dan told me you were going to see him rather than him coming back here, that is a great idea! Get some sun, girlfriend! Then go to france, then get a kid...what are you talking about nothing to look forward to for a few months??!! you're gonna be crazy busy!

  3. I know, I know. Excited for the baby but also completely overwhelmed.

  4. Arizona? What a brilliant idea!

    And I was equally tempted to set low expectations for 2012 but I'm forcing myself to aim high and dream big(ish). It's actually kind of exciting that way. :)

    Wishing you peace that passes understanding, xo

  5. Thank you for your support, friends. I think this was just written on a bad day. I have gained new perspective and I'm ready to take on 2012 and make it the best year ever!


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