Friday, October 04, 2013

Guest Post: Ruthy // Thoughts on Being an Older First-Time Mom

This is my dear friend, Ruthy, from Discovery Street. She's a 35 year old first time mom to the ADORABLE Parker Penny. Here is a little piece of her heart. Thanks for sharing, Ruthy!  - Lindsy

I'm 35 and my only child is one.  I've yet to meet an older first time mom; I know they exist, but I just don't know any. Most of the friends I've met here in Tacoma are 25-30 years old. 

I didn't plan it this way; in my head I imagined getting married by 29 and  adopting my first kid (I never thought I'd want to get pregnant) at 31. So when I was still single at 30 I knew there was a wrench in my plans. 

I've seen multiple blog posts lately on  moms lamenting over feeling like they've lost themselves and have had to put their pursuits and passions on hold because of having kids.  This is one area that I'm truly grateful for God's timing in my life.  Since I can remember I had always wanted to be a successful career woman.  I've had a few demanding careers in my life that I really enjoyed and had a lot of success in...and quite frankly, I don't think that success would've been possible with kids.  (To all the moms out there who do it, I sincerely applaud you). 

By the time I was ready for a family, I was ready to leave the career world.  I really, really wanted to be a mom.  I don't feel like being a mom is holding me back from anything, it's exactly what I want in life right now.  And I'm just grateful to be in that place in life. 

I'm sure when I'm 40 and I drop Parker off at her first day of Kindergarten, and I see women literally half my age sans gray hair and wrinkles with kids the same age, I'll curse under my breath a little, but honestly there is a confidence I have, even as a first time mom, that I can only contribute to having lived a few more years of life a decade or two longer.  

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying there aren't incredibly happy, confident moms in their early or mid 20's (I know a lot of them!)  I just don't think I would've been one of them.  I wanted a career, I wanted to travel the world, I wanted to be married and kid free for awhile; I didn't want to feel like kids were holding me back from those things. 

So yes, being the oldest mom on the block has it's obvious drawbacks, but for my sweet daughter's sake, I'm a bit wiser, and I couldn't be happier that my life is no longer about my wants and desires, it's about hers. 

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